Pebble of love

My 7 year old son is a good kid. He can be so pleasant to his younger siblings, and then other times he is a Monster! Unfortunately, I have seen more of the monster lately.

He is fully capable of completing his chores alone but he makes everything seem so hard. He seems to work harder at throwing a fit than the actual assignment requires.

Sam and I have had several talks about what we can do to help him with his attitude.
We’ve learned from Church Leaders and books that the best thing to do is love it out of them. It always helps when we don’t react to his fit and instead offer a long loving hug. (And sometimes it’s REALLY hard on my part to offer that hug) But something triggers his emotions and he is a grump again.
It’s hard to see him is such an awful mood.

I have been praying for a solution to offer this little boy some happiness, and this morning I think I found it.

During my scripture study I read how God has always required His children to make covenants. God promises to bless us, and we promise to obey. He sets the terms of Gospel covenants and we either accept or reject them. Keeping covenants brings blessings in this life and exaltation in the life to come.

I thought maybe my 7 year old needs to feel “blessed” or acknowledged for his goodness. Could he feel so terrible inside because he doesn’t feel like he is a good kid?

I know I keep covenants and live by a different standard, like so many other Lattter-Day Saints, because I know the Lord will bless me. I am banking on those blessings!!

Tonight I announced to my 3 kids (ages 7,5, and 3) that I would be handing out pebbles (little colored rocks I bought at a craft store) for random acts. I didn’t put any conditions on what they could or couldn’t do, but I did say after Dad and I talked we would let them redeem their pebbles for privileges.

Can you guess who earned the most pebbles in 2 hours?
My monster melted away and I found my good kid back in my arms telling me how much he loved me and how he wanted to hug me forever.

I asked him to explain why he felt so good and his answer was very touching to me.
He said, “Mom, I feel so good inside because you let me be helpful to you.”

He transformed right in front of me.

I think I would find it difficult to keep my covenants with God if I never felt his blessings. I see His blessings everyday. I FEEL his love for me...especially when I am trying to do my part.

My son isn’t any different. He needs to be noticed. The pebbles provided him with the recognition that what he was doing was good in my eyes. The more little pebbles he got he had tangible proof that he is good.

There were several times I caught him being extra gentle with his sister and instead of giving him a pebble I gave him a hug and asked him how his actions made him feel. He would give a sigh of satisfaction and tell me he felt good inside. Not once did he ask for a pebble.

In his prayers tonight he gave thanks for being able to be so helpful and earn pebbles.

I am amazed at the amount of goodness and love that oozed out of him.

I need to recognize more of his goodness.