Sunday, November 4, 2007
My Kindergarten Days made an impression! The number one thing I learned about was FEELINGS! I remember feeling things socially, emotionally, and physically that I hadn’t dealt with before. I remember flying off the Teder Toder after a rainy morning and landing in a puddle. I remember walking along the swings only to find myself on the ground with a numb face. And I remember riding my bike balancing a Birdcage on my handlebars for Show and tell, only to find out it wasn’t show and tell day!
No wonder I had a difficult time sending my oldest off to Kindergarten. I felt the sudden need to protect him from the “hard life” he was about to encounter. Have I prepared him?
The weeks and even months leading up to the 1st day of school very little was said about what was going to take place. He knew he was going to Kindergarten but I didn’t want to allow idle time to mess with any concern he might have. I figured we’d ride that wave when it came. Well, the night before the first day of school a group of our friends met at the park and ate pizza for dinner. When we arrived a father asked Jarom if he had any exciting plans the next day. Jarom said, “No.” So the father prodded a little more with, “nothing NEW is going to happen tomorrow? Are you maybe going to try something different for the day?” He was clueless that he was experiencing his first “school night” of his life.
When Jarom was born we lived in a house across the street from an Elementary School, in Ohio, and I would watch the little kids come and go to school. Holding my new baby I had terrible feelings at the thought of sending him off to school. Oh, how I dreaded that day. Now fast forward to the present day...Jaorm’s 1st day of school. This is how it went.
He wakes up and picks out his sleeveless Spider-man shirt and shorts to wear. Not the choice I would have picked out of all the new school clothes he has hanging in his closet. (lesson #1 to Mom- Jarom has an opinion of his clothing! I’ve had to return several shirts on the account that they look like church shirts because they have a collar and buttons!) Then he moves on to doing his hair. I thank my lucky stars that he likes his hair short and spiky and pray the day will be slow to come when he likes it in his eyes or a different color! I can handle a half wet head and a gob of gel in the front at this age- No Problem! Ok, we’ve arrived at the school and I notice he has syrup pasted all over his cheek! I search the car for a wipe and on this particular day, not one can be found! You guessed it! I did what every kid hates and licked my finger and attempted to do the job. I placed myself in the “annoying mom category” and I knew I crossed that line. In that moment I looked into his eyes and drew some strength from my 5 year old. There wasn’t a trace of apprehension on his face. He was moving forward with or without me. As we began walking through the parking lot he held my hand and for that brief walk I felt the bond between us. I felt the security I gave him and the years of preparation we enjoyed together. Then it happened. Without saying a word or even slowing in step he withdrew his hand from mine as he approached the school doors. I’ll always remember how I felt at that second my child let go of MY hand. It was as if he was saying to himself or perhaps even me, “I’m ready for this.” Together we walked side by side into his class.
This wasn’t how I envisioned the day to go. Lesson #2 to Mom- Mom needs to let go.