I am returning to India!
I'm going to work in leprosy colonies with Rising Star Outreach again. Although I know what to expect (this being my 3rd time there) I still have the jitters.
I experience culture shock every time I go. Life there is incomparable to my life here in the US.
Being in India is life changing for me. I say that because my life litterlay changes while I'm there. I am a different person. I leave my husband ( whom I am thankful supports me) & 4 kids along with the roles I play to each of them behind to be...me?
I am ME in India, and quite frankly I get out of practice on being just ME.
India offers me unlimited "reflection"time. Everything I see, hear, smell, and taste is...strange.
Having all 4 senses offended at once causes me to seek comfort quickly. In a third world country "comfort" isn't out for the taking. After being uncomfortable long enough I realize I need to get comfortable being uncomfortable. (That's a humbling and sometimes humilitating experience)
I LOVE my stay at home mom calling, and I think I've hidden behind some of the titles that go along with it. My first trip to India in 2011was the first time I stood alone as myself, Ember, since I was married.
Imagine what it would feel like leaving a job you've had for 15 years. Wether you loved the job or not, that first day off would be a bit awkward, right? So it is with me while I am in India.
I'm like a fish out of water at first.
I'm getting better at it, it's opportunities such as these that push me out of my comfort zone that show me who I am. Each time I step up to be Me the next time is slightly eaiser.
I'm still nervous when I film an event, my hands still shake when I take pictures and I've been doing these things for years. I'm obviously taking it slow. :)
Because I AM a mom, and I AM a wife I want to be ME for them too. I want to show them what I look like being passionate over something personal. I want to show them what I look like being "out of Character" while trying new things. I want to show them WHO I am.
In 2012 I took my family along with me to India. We all served in the Leprosy colonies and played with the school kids. They saw me in my element and I saw them grow in uncomfortable circumstances. They supported me. They learned who their mom IS and my husband saw ME. (Probably something he hadn't seen in awhile)
I am passionate about photography
I am passionate about videography
I am passionate about writing
I am passionate about India
I'm hanging up my stay at home mom hat for the time being but when I return it's a better fit.
"He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened" ~Laozi